Why Collaborative Divorce is Different & Better

By:  Anthony C. Adamopoulos, Divorce Mediator, Arbitrator & Collaborative Lawyer

THE DIFFERENCE:

The Collaborative Divorce Process is so much better because it is the only process where the attorneys are committed, by written agreement, to concentrate on settlement, AND, if they cannot get a settlement, they cannot represent you in litigation.

The difference is truly transformative in divorce law.  In litigation, divorce attorneys cannot say that their first and only priority is to get a settlement.  Collaborative Attorneys can and do.

THE PROCESS:

First, you must be committed to a quick and less expensive resolution of your divorce; rather than winning in court litigation.

Once you are committed to a quick and less expensive resolution, you each select your own Collaborative Attorney who is specially trained to practice Collaborative Divorce.  Not all attorneys are certified to be Collaborative Attorneys.

You, your spouse, and the two attorneys then sign a contract committing all efforts to resolution.

The next real difference from litigation is that you and your spouse, with the guidance of your Collaborative Attorneys, will then use two key experts – a Financial Neutral and a Facilitator Neutral.  Your Facilitator expedites the process by helping you and your spouse identify short and long term goals and overcome inter-personal roadblocks.  Your Financial Neutral expedites the process by analyzing the unique needs of your family, identifying tax provisions related to those needs and creating realistic plans to preserve family income and property.  And, the neutrals will bill at fees below the attorneys’ fees.  This means that unlike other divorce situations, if, for example, you and your spouse disagree over a parenting plan, the Facilitator Neutral will help resolve the parenting problem at a lower rate than the attorneys’ fees.  Or, if there is a disagreement over whether to sell the house, the Financial Neutral will work on a resolution rather than the two higher paid attorneys.

In resolving issues that are delaying settlement, neither the attorneys nor the neutrals will be concerned about “winning”; they will concentrate on meeting the real needs of you and your spouse rather than any psychological “want to win”.

GETTING STARTED:

The easiest, but not the only, way to get started is to go to the really informative website for North Shore Collaborative Divorce.

Once at that site, select an attorney with whom you would like to work; suggest that your spouse do the same.  If you would rather start by first talking with a certified Collaborative Attorney, that works too.

Of course, you can also call me at (978) 744-9591.

That’s it!  Your attorney will walk you through the process.

ANTHONY C. ADAMOPOULOS’ DIVORCE RESOLUTION SERVICES  

(978) 744-9591

ACABOSTON@AOL.COM

 

© 2019 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT FROM NORTH SHORE COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ABOUT ITS NEXT WORKSHOP

Chart Your Course to a Better Divorce – What You Need to Know

If you are contemplating divorce or already knee-deep in the process, this 2.5 hour educational workshop is for you. Chances are, you are overwhelmed and can’t seem to find the right answers to your specific questions about the divorce process. Your friends tell you one thing and your family tells you another. But the only way to get through one of the most difficult events of your life is to be empowered with the information you need to make informed decisions.

Who gets the house? Will I get child support and alimony? How does the new tax law impact alimony in 2019? Am I entitled to half of my spouse’s retirement even though I never worked? Can a pension be divided? Am I going to be financially okay after the divorce?

You have so many questions and we have all the answers. Our workshop will focus on the legal, emotional and financial issues commonly encountered in the divorce process. Our Family Law attorneys discuss your options with regards to which process you should choose – litigation, collaborative or mediation, as well as explaining the law when it comes to support issues like child support, family support and alimony.

Our experienced Divorce Coaches discuss the emotional roadblocks you will experience and offer ways on how to handle them. Family issues like how to tell the children or how to continue relationships with grandparents and in-laws are also addressed.

Our Divorce Financial Experts discuss the different types of assets commonly divided in divorce along with the potential pitfalls and tax issues that can arise. What are your options with the marital home – do you keep, sell or buyout? We’ll lay it all out for you!

Why do we do this workshop? Because we are a group of divorce professionals who strongly believe that when people are educated and informed about their specific situations, they are better prepared to make the important decisions that are best for them and their family.

We are North Shore Collaborative Divorce. Please visit our website: Northshorecollaborativedivorce.com.

The only way to empower yourself with accurate information is to hear it directly from the experts – those divorce professionals who focus solely on working with divorcing spouses.

AT DANVERS’ PEABODY INSTITUTE LIBRARY

(15 Sylvan Street, Danvers, MA 01923)

Saturday, February 9, 2019 

9:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m.

This Workshop is FREE!

 

AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT FROM NORTH SHORE COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ABOUT ITS NEXT WORKSHOP

Chart Your Course to a Better Divorce – What You Need to Know

If you are contemplating divorce or already knee-deep in the process, this 2.5 hour educational workshop is for you. Chances are, you are overwhelmed and can’t seem to find the right answers to your specific questions about the divorce process. Your friends tell you one thing and your family tells you another. But the only way to get through one of the most difficult events of your life is to be empowered with the information you need to make informed decisions.

Who gets the house? Will I get child support and alimony? How does the new tax law impact alimony in 2019? Am I entitled to half of my spouse’s retirement even though I never worked? Can a pension be divided? Am I going to be financially okay after the divorce?

You have so many questions and we have all the answers. Our workshop will focus on the legal, emotional and financial issues commonly encountered in the divorce process. Our Family Law attorneys discuss your options with regards to which process you should choose – litigation, collaborative or mediation, as well as explaining the law when it comes to support issues like child support, family support and alimony.

Our experienced Divorce Coaches discuss the emotional roadblocks you will experience and offer ways on how to handle them. Family issues like how to tell the children or how to continue relationships with grandparents and in-laws are also addressed.

Our Divorce Financial Experts discuss the different types of assets commonly divided in divorce along with the potential pitfalls and tax issues that can arise. What are your options with the marital home – do you keep, sell or buyout? We’ll lay it all out for you!

Why do we do this workshop? Because we are a group of divorce professionals who strongly believe that when people are educated and informed about their specific situations, they are better prepared to make the important decisions that are best for them and their family.

We are North Shore Collaborative Divorce. Please visit our website: Northshorecollaborativedivorce.com.

The only way to empower yourself with accurate information is to hear it directly from the experts – those divorce professionals who focus solely on working with divorcing spouses.

AT DANVERS’ PEABODY INSTITUTE LIBRARY

(15 Sylvan Street, Danvers, MA 01923)

Saturday, February 9, 2019 

9:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m.

This Workshop is FREE!

 

If We Agree on Everything, How Long Does it Take to Get Through Divorce Mediation?

By Anthony C. Adamopoulos, Divorce Mediator, Arbitrator and Collaborative Lawyer

 

Not very long at all.

Here is the process:

  1. Make an appointment for you and your spouse through my office. You can usually get an appointment within a week.

At the first session, about two hours, I will learn what agreements, you and your spouse have come to on the children, on support and on how the property will be divided. Assuming the financial statement, you were asked to bring with you, is in order, I then go to the next step.

  1. I will then prepare a draft Separation Agreement based upon what you and your spouse agreed to at our first meeting. The turn-around time for this is about a week.
  2. You review the Separation Agreement draft which I will send to you. You decide how long to review it.
  3. We then then talk on the phone or via email about any changes you want. This shouldn’t take more than a day or two to schedule.
  4. If necessary, I revise the draft Separation Agreement. (This takes about 30 minutes.)
  5. We then meet to answer any questions about the Separation Agreement; and, if you and your spouse are ready, you sign the Agreement. This is usually a one-hour meeting.

In short, after two meetings you can have a Separation Agreement that is ready to bring to court for a judge’s review.

ANTHONY C. ADAMOPOULOS’ DIVORCE RESOLUTION SERVICES   

(978) 744-9591

ACABOSTON@AOL.COM

©2018 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

FACING DIVORCE AND CANNOT AFFORD A DIVORCE LAWYER…

…USE LARLIMITED ASSISTANCE REPRESENTATION

LAR lets you hire a specially trained and qualified LAR attorney to help with some of what you must do if you represent yourself, pro se.

You Can Hire an LAR lawyer:

  • to go to court with you just one time, or as many times as you want;
  • to write an Answer, Motion or Pre-Trial Conference Memo;
  • to explain things you do not understand;
  • to help you prepare your Financial Statement.

LAR lets you buy from an LAR lawyer simple fill in the blank forms:

  • Motions for Child Support
  • Motions for Child Custody
  • Answers to Complaints
  • Many More

ANTHONY C. ADAMOPOULOS’ DIVORCE RESOLUTION SERVICES

  FULL LAR SERVICES

(978) 744-9591

ACABOSTON@AOL.COM

©2018 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

What is the Difference Between Divorce Mediation and Collaborative Divorce?

By Anthony C. Adamopoulos, Divorce Mediator, Arbitrator and Certified Collaborative Lawyer

MEDIATION is an independent, voluntary, confidential process conducted by a mediator, who is neutral. Attorneys are not required. The mediator will:

  • Assist you and your spouse in identifying those issues preventing settlement.
  • Explore various avenues to resolution.
  • Develop a settlement resolution acceptable to you and your spouse.
  • Will prepare a Separation Agreement for presentation to the Court. (Only mediators who are attorneys may draft Separation Agreements.)

The two of you will select the mediator. The mediator’s fees will usually be split between the two of you, however, the two of you may agree to a different responsibility for the fee.

The major benefits of Mediation are:

  • The mediation is private.
  • The mediator will provide all the time you and your spouse need to work on a resolution.
  • Experienced mediators have settlement rates of between 85% and 97%.
  • An attorney need not be present at mediation sessions.

In COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE, you, your spouse, your Collaborative lawyers and Coaches make up the Collaborative Team. The Team has one goal, the quick and efficient resolution of all issues without trial litigation.

Coaches make your divorce process efficient and usually less expensive. The most common Coaches are the Facilitator and the Financial Neutral. The Facilitator expedites the process by helping you and your spouse identify term goals and overcome inter-personal roadblocks. The Financial Neutral expedites the process by analyzing the financial needs of your family, identifying tax provisions related to those needs and creating realistic plans to preserve family income and property. Coach hourly fees are often much lower than attorney hourly fees.

In Collaborative Divorce, attorneys are specially trained and certified.

Your Professional Collaborative Team will:

  • Identify issues regarding the children, support and property division that are preventing resolution.
  • Divide primary responsibility for resolving those issues. For example, issues dealing with the children will be addressed primarily by the Facilitator Coach; issues about the amount of support needed will be addressed by the Financial Coach.
  • Have the required Separation Agreement, Petition for Divorce and Affidavit prepared, executed and filed.
  • Have your attorneys accompany you to the Probate and Family Court for your divorce hearing before a Judge.

The major benefits of Collaborative Divorce are:

  • From beginning to end, you are with and “supported” by a team dedicated to getting you and your spouse divorced quickly and efficiently.
  • All issues are dealt with and resolved in confidential sessions.
  • Your attorneys handle all the administrative court matters to get your divorce papers filed, docketed and scheduled for a hearing.
  • At your divorce hearing your attorneys will respond to questions of the judge, thereby avoiding rescheduling of the hearing because you did not have an attorney to correctly answer questions.

©2018 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

A Divorce Workshop for Those Facing Divorce

NORTH SHORE COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE

PRESENTS

Learn What you Need to Know –

A Divorce Workshop for Those Facing Divorce

 

Getting Divorced? A workshop for those facing divorce. Learn about the legal, financial, family and personal issues that accompany the divorce process.

  • How do I get divorced and where do I start?
  • Is Mediation better and less expensive than Litigation?
  • Is Collaborative Divorce better than Mediation and Litigation?
  • Will I get or have to pay Child Support and Alimony?
  • What are Marital Assets and how are they split? What about an Inheritance?
  • Will our children be okay? How do we tell them?

Our experienced, volunteer Family Law Attorneys, Divorce Coaches and Divorce Financial Analyst will provide the information you need to empower you through the divorce process.

YOU HAVE OPTIONS – COME, LEARN WHAT THEY ARE

Saturday, September 15th, 10:00am to 12:30pm

Danvers Library (Peabody Institute Library)

15 Sylan Street, Danvers, MA

This workshop is complimentary

RSVP: 978-744-9591/ ACABOSTON@AOL.COM

STUCK IN DIVORCE COURT? HERE IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO CUT COSTS AND AGGRAVATION!

Are you in divorce litigation?

Are you having second thoughts – time standards, discovery cost, no trial in sight? Enough!

You have complained to your attorney and your attorney reports that your spouse’s attorney has heard the same complaints from your spouse.  Your attorney suggests mediation or conciliation.

What is the difference between Divorce Mediation and Divorce Conciliation?

Mediation is an independent, voluntary, confidential process conducted by a mediator, who is neutral. The mediator will:

  • Assist you and your spouse in identifying and discussing those issues keeping the two of you from settlement.
  • Explore with you and your spouse various avenues to resolution.
  • Develop a settlement acceptable to you and your spouse.

The two of you will select the mediator. The mediator’s fees will be split between the two of you or paid as the two of you agree.

The major benefits to Mediation are:

  • The mediation is private. There is no report to the Judge.
  • The mediator will provide all the time you and your spouse need to work on a resolution.
  • Experienced mediators have settlement rates of between 85% and 97%.
  • If the mediation is in the 3-15% that fail, you and your spouse may enter a written agreement (stipulation) stating that all that was agreed to in the mediation shall not be litigated at trial.

The major negatives to Mediation are:

  • The Mediator is paid.
  • If the mediation is in the 3-15% that fail, the parties will have to return to the litigation process for the unresolved issues.
  • Since you are in litigation, you must get permission from the judge to “take a time out” for mediation. Your attorney will handle this.

Conciliation is a court related process in which a court appointed neutral (the Conciliator) assists parties to resolve their case by:

  1. Clarifying the issues preventing a settlement; and then
  2. Assessing the strengths and weaknesses of each side’s arguments; and
  3. If the divorce cannot be resolved, then the Conciliator explores the steps which remain to prepare the case for trial.

The Court usually allocates two hours for the Conciliation session. The Conciliator is not paid, but there is an administration fee, currently $50.00 per party.

The major benefits to Conciliation are:

  • The trained Conciliator will assess your “side” and your spouse’s “side”. You will then be able to consider the assessment in planning your next step, e.g., trial or settlement.
  • The Conciliator does not get paid.

The major negatives to Conciliation are:

  • The Conciliation lasts a short time, contrasted to Divorce Mediation.
  • The Conciliator may report her/his assessment to the Judge and any opinion as to whether someone is not acting in good faith.

What should you do?

Statistically, 97% of divorce litigation will settle within days of the trial. That means, even though you and your spouse each paid an enormous amount of money to get ready for trial, it may never happen (97% of the time).

The sensible thing is to avoid more costs now, stop the litigation, and settle your differences in mediation or arbitration.

©2018 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

Divorce Arbitration is the Way to Go! So……

A decision of our Appeals Court, Gravlin v. Gravlin, is helpful for those facing divorce.

For collaborative divorce attorneys and divorce mediators, the decision confirms that arbitration is the viable alternative to court litigation for resolving a single issue or even taking the place of a full court trial.

In Gravlin, the Appeals Court acknowledged “… arbitration has long been recognized as a valid means of resolving disputes between divorcing parties.” This Blog has often praised the value of arbitration as an alternative to divorce litigation; with Gravlin, the Appeals Court stamped an imprimatur of sorts on divorce arbitration.

While arbitration is available to replace a public court trial, it is also available if collaboration or mediation reaches a deadlock (a stalemate on one or two remaining issues); then, it is time for divorce arbitration.

When parties follow a simple process, the Appeals Court promises a “… strict standard of review [that] is high[ly] deferential…” to an arbitration award.

What does the simple process involve? The simple process requires that:

  • Respective counsel advise each party.
  • Parties freely enter an Agreement to Arbitrate.
  • Parties knowingly waive a court trial and submit to arbitration.

If there is any trial court review of an arbitration award, the review will be limited to determining:

  • The arbitrator’s award was confined to what he/she was asked to decide;
  • The award did not give relief that is prohibited by law;
  • The award is not based on fraud, arbitrary conduct, or procedural irregularity in the hearing.

(In my experience, the selection of an experienced, knowledgeable arbitrator will result in a positive review and enforcement of the award.)

For collaborative attorneys and mediators, Gravlin is another reason to recommend arbitration for settlement stalemate.

For parties facing divorce or divorce stalemate, arbitration is an alternative to a costly, lengthy and publicly litigated trial.

*Anthony is a divorce arbitrator, collaborative attorney and divorce mediator. His office is in Salem.

© 2016 Anthony C. Adamopoulos

 

DIVORCE WORKSHOP – Take the Next Step and Untie the Knot

knot

Getting Divorced? This half-day workshop on taking the next step toward untying the knot will cover the legal, financial, family and personal issues that are often encountered during the divorce process.

  • How do I get divorced and where do I start?
  • Is Mediation better and less expensive than Litigation?
  • Will I get or have to pay Child Support and Alimony?
  • What are Marital assets and how are they split? What about an Inheritance?
  • Will our children be okay? How do we tell them?

Our experienced, volunteer Family Law Attorneys, Divorce Coach and Divorce Financial Analyst will provide the knowledge and information you need to empower you through the divorce process with confidence and peace of mind.  The more you know, the better the outcome.

YOU HAVE OPTIONS – COME LEARN WHAT THEY ARE

March 11th –  9:00 am – 12:30 pm

The Barn at 10 Liberty Street, Danvers, MA – Exit 22 on 128

Cost $30 – Includes a 36-page Divorce Handbook

Pastries, muffins and coffee will be served
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The Divorce Center is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. Our mission is to make divorce more civilized and less traumatic for everyone involved, especially the children.

For more information and to register, please visit www.TheDivorceCenter.org